Sometimes you just have to COMMIT
July 31st, 2008
If I ever get married again, my wedding vows will be written in PL/SQL, with the honorable Larry Ellison presiding over the ceremony. I’m sure he’s gotten his ordination through the Universal Life Church by now.
START TRANSACTION
UPDATE life SET husband='matt', wife='annie';
Then Mr. Ellison would ask the crowd gathered at the event if there is any reason we shouldn’t be wed, and ROLLBACK; if so.
In the end marriage is about one thing, you just gotta COMMIT;.
If you didn’t understand a damn bit of that, you’re not nerdy enough, and should go learn about transactions, commits, and rollbacks.
Habitat for Inhumanity
June 11th, 2008
Congrats to [variable] on having his 15 minutes of fame on the daily show.
It’s too bad they didn’t let you keep the Enhanced Home Makeover shirt.
Don’t Mess With My Camera, Bro
May 13th, 2008
Jeremy Brooks has a great writeup entitled “If You Put That Picture On The Internet I’ll Call My Lawyer.” I can only hope to handle a similar situation in the same way. Although, there are parts of the city I want to photograph but will not venture there until I have my Ohio concealed firearm carry permit. Better to have it and not need it, than need it and not have it.
I cannot possibly describe how awesome this is: The Quest For Every Beard Type. I love my beard, you should too!
Electronics Geek + Gamer = Hacks
April 23rd, 2008
I love hacking electronics, or at least thinking about it. I’ve had this particular thought before, but I never realized the beauty of it in action until now. Go to about 1:30 and watch from there if you’re impatient. The video is lengthy but shows just what a little Microchip PIC and some tinkering can pull off. Can you say “Machine Pistol?”
Via Hack a Day.
Words cannot describe just how much destruction a simple water heater can cause if its safety features are disabled/bypassed. You must watch this video, it is worth every bit of your time. Seriously - this got a huge laugh out of me, and out of everyone in the office who I showed it to. Much thanks to Mike (Vendy) for showing it to me in the first place. Without further adieu…
Morally Inferior, Politically Superior
March 12th, 2008
News has been rattling around the web about the governor of New York, Eliot Spitzer being “linked to a prostitution ring.” And that’s putting it lightly - the executive summary version of his offense reads like the note your principal sent home with you when you got caught smoking in the boys bathroom.
The Portal: A Day in the Life of a Turret is something that you should watch if you’ve ever played Portal. Or even if you haven’t, you just to imagine what life would be like for turrets assigned to kill everyone, but only if they were sarcastic and hated each other. It’s brilliant!
A blow-off valve, in short, allows the turbocharger in a turbocharged engine (forced induction, the pushing of air into the intake) to relieve pressure inside the turbo. Normally this pressure is vented back into the intake, but sometimes it’s sent out into the atmosphere as a noise maker. Some think it sounds cool, and I’m one of those people… Too bad it’s apparently illegal. Note that I think this is cool for high end use, not for you and your turbo civic or jetta. Humbug!
So what happens when someone stuffs a duck call on the end of valve, and that valve opens and vents pressure? You’ll have to watch below, I had a hell of a good laugh with this. Apparently so did variable! Courtesy of MDK!