The Portal: A Day in the Life of a Turret is something that you should watch if you’ve ever played Portal. Or even if you haven’t, you just to imagine what life would be like for turrets assigned to kill everyone, but only if they were sarcastic and hated each other. It’s brilliant!
The Alternate Truth
February 15th, 2008
Deep breath, roll with it. Alegro! Nota Bene: the following is fiction, hence the title!
Here I sit in ABS vent, pulse quickened, heart racing, stomach singing a song of discontent. I was disconnected, but now I’m back down on terra firma. Shaking, skin aflush. Sweaty, and my face leaving no doubt as to my state of mind; eyes half-open, lower lip still quivering and a bloody nose to boot. I think about how I must be so incredibly subverted from my original purpose, and stress induced nosebleeds — why is this happening to me?
Breath out, slowly. Don’t hold it in. More after the break.
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As you’ll remember from First post on this subject a while back, the DMV liked to jerk me around. And there was much hilarity in my analysis of the conundrum set forth before me. Let me now present Part II — there’s no conclusion yet.
The day after my first run-in with the harpies at the DMV, I estimated that the situation would be fairly easy to resolve now that I knew that all they really wanted in life was a copy of my wretched PA automobile title. To that end, I phoned PSECU again and delivered a lengthy discourse to the customer service representative on what was going on. Because they’re PSECU, they’re helpful – the CSR informed me that the easiest course of action would be if Clerk of Courts office faxed a request in for a copy of my PA title. I informed the CSR that “there’s no way those grumpy old women would actually comply with that request”, and I am 100% confident that still holds true. These are people there for a paycheck, nothing more – truly the bottom of the state service barrel — Like worse than DOT workers, except without the shovels and watching 1 of their coworkers do their job while 3 others stand around mining their noses for gold.